With Fountain of Youth, Apple TV+ has made its first Netflix movie (and that’s not a good thing)

I had almost no believe So peculiar, very forgotten, and “youthful fountain” really was when I watched. I am a person who is generally skeptical of John Krasinski as an acting star, but even his signature charm is missing from this film; Natalie Portman, who Oscar wonAlmost as terrible as she was in the “Star Wars” prequels. That’s not even Krasinski or Portman; all Bad in this film (even Stanley Tucci, which was ropeed to a scene about two minutes that appears to occur in Italy; Maybe he phoned this in a break on “Conclave?”). Probably because they are saddled with some of the worst and most clunky dialogue I’ve experienced for a while. After Charlotte Portman came across Luke’s sexual, Shadow Esme and Luke later describes a previous run with the mysterious woman, Charlotte says to her brother, “When you say running in, do you mean that strange, dysfunctional chemistry that you both had happened?” Luke responds, “When you say chemistry, do you mean an attraction?”

Advertisement

“I’m now justice fleeing. Fortunately, my son is now with me on the Lam,” Charlotte later said while she was drunk on Owens’ private plane. Shortly after, she describes her husband as one who has “all the virtues of a dog,” and at that time Luke is wondering if he could “lick herself …” (Charlotte cuts him off and drags this crappy joke down even more by saying that her husband had no “loyalty” dog. The same sceneCharlotte weighs Luke for why He wants to find the well in the first place, and he looks lame:

“Father. Recognition. He deserves. He did not insist on him, but I will. After what he committed? The world is indebted to him. And the name of our family deserves to be respected.”

Advertisement

“I don’t need respect. Dad certainly doesn’t need respect, because he’s dead,” Charlotte responds messy. We have already been told, about twenty different times, that their explorer father had died, but probably director Guy Ritchie and screenwriter James Vanderbilt worried that we had all developed Amnesia or suffered a head injury during this film. Yes i am dunking on this movie and lot. Only that … The world does not need another “red warning” or “The Gray Man” or, frankly, “another youth fountain.” Apple TV+, don’t become Netflix! You do “dismiss!” Don’t waste all that goodwill!

“Fountain of Youth” is streaming on Apple TV+ now, but as you may have collected, I don’t recommend it.