Sci-Fi’s action thriller is the worst reviewed film in the history of Tomatoes Rotten

By Robert Scucci
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If you have read any of my movie reviews over the years, you will notice the same stunning pattern as my wife, children, parents, and best friends have all arisen on it before encouraging me to see a professional for extensive cognitive behavioral therapy. I. mind Bad movies – I really worship them because it is so easy to criticize art, even when so many people devote their time and energy to something that is so terrible. After seeing 2002 finally Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever.

I love bad movies because I admire anyone who pushes through their self-doubt to bring an idea to life. Most of us say we can do it better, but the reality is that we can’t. However, in the case of Ballistic: Ecks vs SeverI am ready to re -evaluate my position on the matter.

From this writing, Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever is listed as the worst film ever reviewed Rotten tomatoes. Not only does the film have a critical 0 percent score, it has undertaken this abrasive assessment across 118 unique reviews, making it true penalty of the senses and your sensibility in every way possible.

What’s the point?

Watch Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever Once very fast, read the whole plot declined on Wikipedia and IMDB, watch it a second time at 2x speeds along with the plot, and still don’t know what the hell is happening in the abominations $ 70 million. I will probably watch it once again just to try to make sense of it before throwing my hands up and becoming a religious man because I have never felt this missing in my whole life, and you need some kind of I am a higher power to give me back in so I can once again be a productive member of society.

The alleged plot

Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever Starts out somewhat cohesive when we are introduced to the film’s titular characters.

First we are aware of Sever (Lucy Liu), an orphan Chinese girl recruited by the Defense Information Agency (DIA) and trained to be an adult to become a non -hearted but highly skilled mercenary before slipping off eventually as a rogue operator for reasons Not revealed. Sever hijacks Michael one hundred (Aidan Drummond), son of Diann Director, Robert Gant (Gregg Henry), for reasons also unexplained. Former Jeremiah FBI ashiant Ecks (Antonio Banderas) He is asked to come out of retirement to pursue a hundred case, but he has his qualifications, as he leaves the FBI after his wife died in a car bombing.

The reason there is a hundred cause so important is because Robert has implanted a biological weapon called Softkill to Michael so that he can smuggle the technology to the United States. How Softkill works, you ask? Well, it’s a microscopic nanobot that can cause a heart attack or stroke at a button press, which is exactly what you don’t want to do Enter in your own child.

Pupping in his increasingly troubled explanation between pulled out action sequences and budgeting blossoming, Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever Runs through most of the tired acting movie ropes one would expect. Not only do Ecks and Sever put aside their differences while learning that they are fighting against a common enemy, both of which are also worried by their past, and the clock ticks like that they can save the day from certain destruction, but only after unloading an unimaginable amount of rounds to their opposition while always escaping a relatively unharmed.

I do not award you any points, and may God have mercy on your soul

After watching Ballistic: Ecks vs SeverI immediately called my friend who recommended that I watch it in the first place. For a moment, I actually thought that softkill was implanted in my spine while I was sleeping, and that I was experiencing a stroke while giving myself 91 minutes of pain after someone triggered the Killswitch. After a long conversation from heart to heart where I broke down soberly, I was told, to my relief, that my experience was not a “me” problem, but rather the result of discovery, and trying to make sense of, the actual worst film made ever.

While I still wonder if the smell of burnt toast will eventually creep on me, making me immovable and in hospice care, I’m glad to know that I can finally start healing after watching Ballist: Ecks Vs. Sever.

If you want to have an existential crisis as no other when watching a sum of migraine stimulating explosions take your sense of being, you can rent the title on demand Video Prime (availability subject to location), or Google Play From this writing.